Sofia Machray on burnout and the song that emerged from it

Words by Hannah Powell. Images by Java Wilde.

What do you do when you burn out? Write a song about it, of course.

Sofia Machray, an indie alt dream-rock artist based in Pōneke Wellington, put pen to the page to make it make sense. Releasing her first single since her debut EP Language of Flowers, ‘Pulling on a String’ tells the story of the last year balancing life and work and an injury all while navigating life in her mid-twenties.

 “I had a feeling at the start of the year, like I really needed to get away. I felt this pull to get out of Wellington,” she explains.

“I just had a crazy year last year, which was amazing, but I was definitely at the peak of burnout.” Booking an Airbnb and travelling up the coast to Ōtaki, the Arrowtown-born artist knew deep-down she needed to sit still and clear her schedule.

“With my shoulder injury earlier in the year, I was agitated by everything. Maybe I need to quit, I thought, maybe I need to move, because a lot of my friends were moving away, all this spiral of things.” Leaving her phone in the car, the musician went off-grid, checking in to a beachside cabin with only an overnight bag and a guitar.

But there lay the catch-22. Sofia already felt the pressure to make the weekend a songwriting trip. In the end, she pushed it aside and spent a lot of the trip walking along the beach instead. The shore, she says, felt infinite.

“When you’re alone, it feels like you’re reconnecting with yourself,” she says. “You can hear all your thoughts really clearly. For me, having that time and space was really helping me to allow for creative things to start flowing.” Her latest track, ‘Pulling on a String’, was born out of the quiet. In the still of Ōtaki, the pieces began to fall back into place. “It got me thinking about a bunch of things, like battling with always needing to move and do things and not appreciating what I have before I seek more things in my life.”

“That’s what the song is about,” she says. “Taking that step back, looking around, looking at what I have and being present.”

In March, Sofia went down to Ōtautahi Christchurch to record with musician and producer Will McGillivray. Recording in Will’s seaside studio with windows wide open to the ocean, Sofia felt she could breathe.

“[Christchurch] seems like a super grounding place,” she says. Spending a week in Lyttelton and travelling to Will’s New Brighton studio, walking along the beach, she says she could see herself living there no sweat. “After working with Will, I really love what’s happening in Christchurch. The music community…like, no one’s gatekeeping,” she adds.

“Everyone’s always there supporting one another and keeping in touch with is really nice.” Receiving development funding from NZ On Air to support recording, Sofia was grateful to mix it up and have a change of scene. Working with Will was timely, too. Her close friend and main collaborator Robbie Pattinson had just left for overseas.

“It’s really exciting for him,” she says. “And it’s pushed me to be open to collaborating with new people like Will, and to develop my own skills and see how far I can get. It is challenging, but I think it will pay off.” In support of her next venture, on Friday 13 September Sofia will take to San Fran to play a fundraising show for her next record – whatever that may look like, she says. 

“I don’t want to disappoint anyone, especially myself,” she explains. “I’m trying to be aware of not putting too much pressure on myself while still setting achievable  goals.”

“I’m still writing for the record. I’ve got three songs that I’m releasing over the next wee while, I have this fundraiser, and then I’ll go into recording.”

Keen to play one last show before she gets shoulder surgery later this month, the gig will celebrate her music to date with a full band accompanying it. Local bands Mystery Waitress and Debt Club will be supporting.

Alongside organising a raffle and getting back into the swing of things, Sofia can’t wait to play ‘Pulling on a String’ for its live debut. It’s been seven months since she last played the stage.

“I think this is my proudest song so far, which is a good feeling,” she says. “I feel like this is the first song where I’ve felt fully myself.”